bone in sub

i had an epiphany today. i was on my way to a noon concert and had left myself plenty of time to get there – the subway usually takes 10-15min from my door to the faculty of music, and i left at 11:35. something was wrong though, so by the time i got off the train at st. george it was 11:58 and i was in a hurry. as i was going up the stairs to the bedford rd. exit, a girl going the opposite way dropped her mitten on the stairs without noticing. i told her “you lost your glove!”, but she didn’t hear, so i picked it up and ran back down and gave it to her. this is everyday weak-samaritan stuff, but i realized later that because i was in a rush, i would NOT have done that for anyone but a cute girl my age. i had no actual interest in her, but i guess biologically (?) i was compelled to be nicer than i would to a guy or a less-attractive girl. it feels like i just realized i’m racist, except i can rationalize this.